Saturday, August 21, 2010

unsent letter #1, done a day late

I am not the superstitious one, even spiritual in any way. I see things pass and then gone. You made me realize that sometimes a person needs to hold on to a memory, a feeling, a supposed warmth of a hug, even to a higher entity. I have tried all of these, but the last one, forgive me, I just can't do.
For the first time in 24 years this day is ordinary. No greetings will be exchanged, no heartfelt embraces, no kisses, certainly no celebration. On this day, that is supposed to be yours, became our license to mope and to miss you.

I have been missing you always. No remembering will ever exhaust my craving to feel you alive again. I have never been the same since you passed. I understand more now how things and people and feelings are ever so ephemeral, always teasing, always gone the minute appreciation comes. You're absence marred me for good, will never be whole and that I am trying to cope up everyday.

Actually, I feel kinda pathetic right now, this letter meant for you will be read by people who I assume don't know you and treasure you like I do. But, let them know how great you are. How you have been the greatest father to me. The best friend, confidant, punisher and buddy I will never have again. Let them know that this day, August 20th will forever be yours and ours. 

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